RECONCILIATION

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From the Hebrew:  “Tikkun Olam” means to “repair the breach”

Romans 12:18 NIV

“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”

June 29, 2021

2 Corinthians 5:16-21 (my paraphrase)

“Because of this decision we don’t evaluate people by what they have or how they look. We looked at the Messiah that way once and got it all wrong, as you know. We certainly don’t look at him that way anymore. Now we look inside, and what we see is that everyone is united with the Messiah and gets a fresh start, is created new. When the old world life is gone; a new kingdom life burgeons!

Look at it! All this comes from the God who calls us into relationship between us and him, and then calls us to settle our relationships with each other. God showed the world His true nature and character of love through the Messiah, giving the world a fresh start by demonstrating His love, acceptance and forgiveness. Now God has given us the task of telling everyone what he is doing. We’re Christ’s representatives. God calls all of us to persuade men and women to drop their differences and enter into God’s work of making things right between all human-kind.”

July 17, 2021

As I move into my “golden” years, (more like “gray” years!), regrets that I have are not missed opportunities, decisions, wrong forks in the road that were taken…my regrets are largely relationships, friendships, that for whatever reason ended before their time.

One such relationship was with a very dear and close friend with whom I worked closely back in the 1980’s. Circumstances caused an ugly breach in our friendship. It was very painful for both of us. Decisions I felt that needed to be made regarding relocation of our office impacted my friend and caused them anguish. They took that out on me, and that in turn caused me great anguish and pain. For many years, neither of us were willing to revisit that era for fear of only adding more pain and anguish. A precious and valuable friendship seemed to be lost forever; whenever I would think of my lost friend, my heart would hurt.

Then, over 30 years later, a miracle happened! We came together. We talked. We apologized to one another. We both owned our parts in the breach of our friendship. And we reconciled. I was so over-joyed that I was in tears. I felt like I had just won the Super-Lottery. No, actually it was better than that.

Reconciliation is a beautiful thing. It’s worth humbling oneself, risking rejection, even risking further hurt. I get to erase one of my deepest regrets! My “gray” years just became a little more “golden.”   –Art Nicklaus

June 29, 2021

“Reconciliation is much more than a one-time event by which a conflict is resolved and peace established.  A ministry of reconciliation goes far beyond problem solving, mediation, and peace agreements.  There is not a moment in our lives without the need for reconciliation.  When we dare to look at the myriad hostile feelings and thoughts in our hearts and minds, we will immediately recognize the many little and big wars in which we take part.  Our enemy can be a parent, a child, a “friendly” neighbor, people with different lifestyles, people who do not think as we think, speak as we speak, or act as we act.  They all can become “them.”  Right there is where reconciliation is needed.”

   —Henri Nouwen

Ten Ways to Live Restoratively

1. Take relationships seriously, envisioning yourself in an interconnected web of people, institutions, and the environment.
    
2. Try to be aware of the impact—potential as well as actual—of your actions on others and the environment.
    
3. When your actions negatively impact others, take responsibility by acknowledging and seeking to repair the harm—even when you could probably get away with avoiding or denying it.
    
4. Treat everyone respectfully, even those you don’t expect to encounter again, even those you feel don’t deserve it, even those who have harmed or offended you or others.
    
5. Involve those affected by a decision, as much as possible, in the decision-making process.
    
6. View the conflicts and harms in your life as opportunities.
    
7. Listen, deeply and compassionately, to others, seeking to understand even if you don’t agree with them. (Think about who you want to be in the latter situation rather than just being right.)
    
8. Engage in dialogue with others, even when what is being said is difficult, remaining open to learning from them and the encounter.
    
9. Be cautious about imposing your “truths” and views on other people and situations.
    
10. Sensitively confront everyday injustices including sexism, racism, and classism [and other examples of systemic and intersectional injustice].